Generally, one when has a life insurance policy on a car, what happens when one dies?
The car is paid off?
Not so in this world.
I was so angry today that my vision got black and tunnelly around the edges. I do not enjoy being lied to, especially when that same person attempted to soothe my worries a month ago and told me that this was all a mistake, that it would all be taken care of, and that the car would be fully paid off. My profanity was mind-boggling and enormous.You can take up the car payments...AND YOU CAN TAKE IT UP THE ASS, FUCKSTICK!
Ordinarily, I feel ashamed when I lose my temper on some sort of customer-service person. However, this one lied
to me. Completely. And there's not a goddamn thing I can do about it. I already checked. The underwriter from the life insurance had the good graces to actually explain this mess to me. I'm not about to get into the details, because it would truly take much longer than I care, but the existence of the bankruptcy is why my mother's car is not fully paid off.
They did pay off about 14K of what was owed, leaving 6k. My brother does not seem overly too concerned about this, and in fact, stayed quite calm in the face of my shouting, raging storm. I told him that he has to deal with the car loan company from now on, that I just can't do it anymore. He's ok with that, which is good. He's going to look into trading the car in for something else. Failing that, he might take up the payments, despite how astronomically high they are.
This entire incident, mind you, took place within fifteen minutes of me arriving at work. An incredibly shitty way to start off my work day on a date I was already feeling ooky about
. Today marks the one year anniversary of my mother leaving this apartment to go to the hospital and never returning home.
I knew it was coming. I felt it making its way over the horizon like some black, sorrowful beast. I stood here and watched the wave rise over my head and threaten to engulf everything I held dear. It's a slow crash, coming down around me, but a crash nonetheless.
(Additionally, today is the Engineer's birthday. I attempted to put on the smiley face, for him. Don't know how well I succeeded in that. Especially considering that 3/4 of the way through celebrating with his family, I passed out on his couch, curled up in a kitten ball. I am so sorry.)
On Saturday, I sat next to my father on the tailgate of his pick-up truck, swinging my legs, and saluted the poppies she planted so many years ago. They're some of the few flowers she planted that are still around his property, most of them have died. And these ones would have gone the way of the wee bin, if he hadn't seen them bloom last year and thusly realized that they were 1. not weeds and 2. extremely beautiful.I miss her, brat.So do I, Daddy.