(no subject)

[thejunipertree]

Lying on the bed this morning with one my cats, Tinker.

I scoop my arms underneath of his fat, black body and turn him over on his back. Something I fully know he despises.

"You are completely in my power!"

MEOW!

"You are now my slave and will submit to my every whim!"

MEOW!

"You have no will other than my own!"

MEOW!

"Go get me a diet Coke, fat ass!"

His eyes narrow and his tail begins lashing back and forth, angrily. He reaches one paw to my face, which is hanging low over him, and ever-so-gently pulls my nosering out with one claw.

"You little bastard! That's the last time I ever try to hyponotize you!"

Comments

[aprilrobin.livejournal.com]

Hey - don't go calling my boyfriend a fat ass!!

[evilbalddago.livejournal.com]

yea, well according to some people he's also an asshole.

[aprilrobin.livejournal.com]

BwahahahHAhahahahaha.
Just when I forgot about it - it's funny again.

[rowan-1958.livejournal.com]

He's got no thumbs...hypnotizing him into getting you a soda won't work. Are *your* thumbs too little to get a soda?? :o)

[padmaclynne.livejournal.com]

he can roll it along the ground with his leetle nose.

[rowan-1958.livejournal.com]

Excellent point, but what if the soda is in the fridge?

[padmaclynne.livejournal.com]

then he should use his mighty thews.

[rowan-1958.livejournal.com]

Ok, I'll bite, what's "thews"?

[padmaclynne.livejournal.com]

it's biceps, i think. usually barbarians have them. mighty ones. so as to power the broadswords.

[padmaclynne.livejournal.com]

after a quick google, i believe it might be a nonsense word. or a name.

[death4breakfast.livejournal.com]

You mess with the cat, you get the claw. That ought to teach you. :)

[dabble.livejournal.com]

See thats what I would have said too, but you put it so much more succinctly.

My cat is more about the verbal clues. Most of these are directed at me and contain the words fuck and you.

Your post made me laugh up a lung too btw :D

It's the Magpie Effect!

[acrorat.livejournal.com]

Jude tried to get Jen's nose stud! The Thieving Rattie - a new opera in the making!