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thejunipertreeI'm such a .
1. I didn't learn how to swim until I was in sixth grade, which is when I taught myself.
2. My index and middle fingers, on both hands, are exactly the same length.
3. I fell off a sideboard when I was four, causing my first concussion, and leaving a scar you can only see when I raise my eyebrows.
4. I have had about eleven concussions.
5. I was terrified of my maternal grandfather, although I used to follow him wherever he went and not speak to him. This caused him to call me by the petname "Ghost".
6. When I was wee, I used to write and draw books for people. One of them, I gave to my grandfather when he was in the hospital with terminal pancreatic cancer.
7. My father swears that my first word was "cigarette".
8. My first crush was on Mighty Mouse.
9. I can turn my right leg completely around, so that it faces in the opposite direction. Without bending my knee.
10. I never learned how to do a cartwheel.
11. I was terrified of the water when I was a little kid. This stems because a friend of mine showed me a photo in an encyclopedia of a drawing of the ocean, with all sorts of fish that live in the different levels. Only it wasn't drawn to scale, or to real life. So I believed that the little blind fish with the dangly shit on their head were enormous and living near the surface.
12. Now, however, you couldn't drag me out of the water with wild horses.
13. In third grade, I convinced a classmate that the weeds growing out near the jungle gym were bean sprouts and he should eat them. He was out sick for a week.
14. I am terrified of heights.
15. I am absolutely terrible at wrapping presents.
16. My toenails don't grow.
17. I suffer from trichotillomania.
18. I have a birthmark on my right hip, it's about the size of a half dollar. It used to be raised up and bumpy, but over the years it's become flat to the point where I can't feel it anymore.
19. I just had to think for several minutes about what side my birthmark was actually on.
20. I also just convinced myself that I was wrong and thusly had to go check. It's on the right.
21. I am banned from stepping foot in the UK.
22. I learned to play the drums because of the movie, "Some Kind of Wonderful".
23. I only truly hate five people in this world.
24. My virginity was forcibly taken from me.
25. I used to have a "problem" with prescription pain killers.
26. To this day, I can't take anything stronger then Alleve.
27. I sleep with a knife under my pillow.
28. I have my grandmother's ashes in a red glass vase.
29. When I was in eighth grade, I tried to kill someone by bashing in his head with a big marble ashtray.
30. When Doctor Seuss died, I cried like a little bitch.
31. I have a mole shaped like a heart on my left shoulder.
32. When I lived in Philadelphia, I used to carry a can of oven cleaner for protection.
33. I am quite adept at throwing knives.
34. My mother didn't let my brothers and I watch "The Three Stooges" when we were little because she thought it was stupid and violent.
35. Some of my fingernails curve dramatically when they grow even a little bit.
36. I met Billy Corgan and didn't realise who he was, which is especially stupid as I am a big fan of the Smashing Pumpkins.
37. I collect stuffed bats, ring tailed lemurs, and Eeyore.
38. I started a teapot collection, but I only have one.
39. I am quite fluent in profanity.
40. I didn't wear pants for about seven years, until recently when Carrie gave me a pair of velvet ones. I've worn them three times since.
41. All of my underwear is black, with the exception of one red bra and one pair of red panties.
42. I have TMJ, which causes me to clench my jaw unconciously.
43. I used to have a rule regarding not buying clothing that cost more then my share of the rent. Then I bought a pair of two hundred dollar patent leather boots, thereby breaking the rule.
44. As bitchy as I am, I give people too many chances.
45. I have been in only three fist fights in my life, all of them with men.
46. I won all three.
47. One of the fist fights was in a Denny's.
48. I read extraordinarily fast, to the point where it's difficult for me to enjoy a book because it doesn't last.
49. I sometimes keep secrets from people, purely for the sake of having something private and just for myself.
50. I have a speech impediment that I went to five years of therapy for. You can't tell that I have one anymore
1. I didn't learn how to swim until I was in sixth grade, which is when I taught myself.
2. My index and middle fingers, on both hands, are exactly the same length.
3. I fell off a sideboard when I was four, causing my first concussion, and leaving a scar you can only see when I raise my eyebrows.
4. I have had about eleven concussions.
5. I was terrified of my maternal grandfather, although I used to follow him wherever he went and not speak to him. This caused him to call me by the petname "Ghost".
6. When I was wee, I used to write and draw books for people. One of them, I gave to my grandfather when he was in the hospital with terminal pancreatic cancer.
7. My father swears that my first word was "cigarette".
8. My first crush was on Mighty Mouse.
9. I can turn my right leg completely around, so that it faces in the opposite direction. Without bending my knee.
10. I never learned how to do a cartwheel.
11. I was terrified of the water when I was a little kid. This stems because a friend of mine showed me a photo in an encyclopedia of a drawing of the ocean, with all sorts of fish that live in the different levels. Only it wasn't drawn to scale, or to real life. So I believed that the little blind fish with the dangly shit on their head were enormous and living near the surface.
12. Now, however, you couldn't drag me out of the water with wild horses.
13. In third grade, I convinced a classmate that the weeds growing out near the jungle gym were bean sprouts and he should eat them. He was out sick for a week.
14. I am terrified of heights.
15. I am absolutely terrible at wrapping presents.
16. My toenails don't grow.
17. I suffer from trichotillomania.
18. I have a birthmark on my right hip, it's about the size of a half dollar. It used to be raised up and bumpy, but over the years it's become flat to the point where I can't feel it anymore.
19. I just had to think for several minutes about what side my birthmark was actually on.
20. I also just convinced myself that I was wrong and thusly had to go check. It's on the right.
21. I am banned from stepping foot in the UK.
22. I learned to play the drums because of the movie, "Some Kind of Wonderful".
23. I only truly hate five people in this world.
24. My virginity was forcibly taken from me.
25. I used to have a "problem" with prescription pain killers.
26. To this day, I can't take anything stronger then Alleve.
27. I sleep with a knife under my pillow.
28. I have my grandmother's ashes in a red glass vase.
29. When I was in eighth grade, I tried to kill someone by bashing in his head with a big marble ashtray.
30. When Doctor Seuss died, I cried like a little bitch.
31. I have a mole shaped like a heart on my left shoulder.
32. When I lived in Philadelphia, I used to carry a can of oven cleaner for protection.
33. I am quite adept at throwing knives.
34. My mother didn't let my brothers and I watch "The Three Stooges" when we were little because she thought it was stupid and violent.
35. Some of my fingernails curve dramatically when they grow even a little bit.
36. I met Billy Corgan and didn't realise who he was, which is especially stupid as I am a big fan of the Smashing Pumpkins.
37. I collect stuffed bats, ring tailed lemurs, and Eeyore.
38. I started a teapot collection, but I only have one.
39. I am quite fluent in profanity.
40. I didn't wear pants for about seven years, until recently when Carrie gave me a pair of velvet ones. I've worn them three times since.
41. All of my underwear is black, with the exception of one red bra and one pair of red panties.
42. I have TMJ, which causes me to clench my jaw unconciously.
43. I used to have a rule regarding not buying clothing that cost more then my share of the rent. Then I bought a pair of two hundred dollar patent leather boots, thereby breaking the rule.
44. As bitchy as I am, I give people too many chances.
45. I have been in only three fist fights in my life, all of them with men.
46. I won all three.
47. One of the fist fights was in a Denny's.
48. I read extraordinarily fast, to the point where it's difficult for me to enjoy a book because it doesn't last.
49. I sometimes keep secrets from people, purely for the sake of having something private and just for myself.
50. I have a speech impediment that I went to five years of therapy for. You can't tell that I have one anymore