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capitalism stole my virginity
Apr. 1st, 2002 12:47 amI'm watching Full Metal Jacket, something which I haven't done in an especially long time. It's been a long weekend, and I'm relishing the quiet in my apartment right now. On Friday, I found the doll which I spoke of in an earlier entry. The Living Dead Doll which caused my boycott of Suncoast Video. Sent The Engineer into Suncoast to buy it for me, but she was sold out. heh. Thee Punk Rock Gods were sending me a message about standing up for my principles, I reckon. I found her at the new Hot Topic store, which I suppose is Thee Capitalism Gods sending me another message. Nonetheless, she is mine. And will be making the trip to my office tomorrow to meet her sisters. They're my little posse. Something which gives the dunderheads I work with pause. They're all a bit frightened of me. And I can't say that I really try to dissuade them from feeling this way. I enjoy it.
Saturday night, The Engineer and I went with The Priest They Called Him to the Easter Vigil at St. Mark's cathedral in Philadelphia. This was most keen, especially as how it's one of the most beautiful churches I've ever set foot in. Three hour service, half of which is done in darkness. The only light comes from the congregation's hand held candles. When I first set foot inside the church, it was pitch black and more than a little bit difficult to see. I later told The Priest They Called Him that my first instinct was to cry out loudly "HOLY FUCKING SHIT, IT'S DARK AS HELL IN HERE!". Thankfully, that impulse was quelled and the churchgoers were not treated to my potty mouth.
The service was interesting, to say the least. A lot of it was sung, which put me into a half meditative trance where I thought almost constantly about sex. During the baptising ritual of the congregation, I was struck in the face with holy water. This drew a large flinch from me, something that the priest doing the water flinging noticed. I quelled the urge to shout "MONEYSHOT", for which I'm sure my companions were immensely grateful.
Lots of kneeling, standing, sitting, and singing. I kneelled, stood, and sat. But, no singing came from my mouth. I also fell off the little pillow that's kept under the pews for the kneeling part of the show. This was most embaressing, luckily no one noticed.
All in all, I enjoyed the service. Especially the bit where they mentioned Mary Magdalene. That made me very happy. The darkness, the singing, and the incense put me into such a state that I really just drifted through the entire ceremony. It felt good. Especially when The Priest They Called Him leaned over during the "Greet The Other People Around You" part of the show and said in his cutesy voice (usually only used with his boyfriend) "You're my girlfriend, Tara." I grinned a lot and gave him a big kiss on the cheek.
Easter itself was spent with a lot of sleeping and driving. I drove out to my father's house in East fucking Jabip for a short visit. We talked of cars and family woes and my upcoming trip to NYC. He prodded me over calling the funeral director he knows and I wembled, as daughters are prone to doing when they are prodded over things which they should have done by now.
Leaving there, and on the way to The Engineer's house for dinner, I saw what I believed at first to be a pheasant on the side of the road. Sitting next to a large brown mass. I swerved, while looking at it (must really learn how to sight see and drive at the same time). The Engineer pointed out that the large brown mass was in actuality a dead deer. And he says the pheasant was most likely a vulture or a buzzard or something. Are those kinds of birds in this part of the country? I never thought that they had been. I mused that it could have been a hawk, as we have thousands of those around here. But, he says that it had an elongated neck. A strange and unsettling sight, especially after finding out that it was a dead deer sitting there.
My face is breaking out in a most horrible manner. Worse than it has probably since high school. And this makes for a very uncomfortable and embaressed me. It's mainly on either side of my jawline and looks a bit like a rash, though I know it's not. Little bumps, little bumps. They make me sick and I have to physically stop myself from clawing at my face with my nails. I've been keeping it under semi-control, but it doesn't seem to be clearing up. If Carrie were accessible at the moment, I'd ask her about that skin care regimene that she concocted. I reckon I can just ask her about it when I see her this week. I feel so ugly like this. The Engineer tells me that it's not too horrifying to look at, and when I'm only looking in the bathroom or bedroom mirror it really isn't all that bad. Natural lighting, however? I look like a fucking leper. I don't even want to know what the harsh lighting in my office is going to make me appear.
Looking most longingly at my cheese grater.
Saturday night, The Engineer and I went with The Priest They Called Him to the Easter Vigil at St. Mark's cathedral in Philadelphia. This was most keen, especially as how it's one of the most beautiful churches I've ever set foot in. Three hour service, half of which is done in darkness. The only light comes from the congregation's hand held candles. When I first set foot inside the church, it was pitch black and more than a little bit difficult to see. I later told The Priest They Called Him that my first instinct was to cry out loudly "HOLY FUCKING SHIT, IT'S DARK AS HELL IN HERE!". Thankfully, that impulse was quelled and the churchgoers were not treated to my potty mouth.
The service was interesting, to say the least. A lot of it was sung, which put me into a half meditative trance where I thought almost constantly about sex. During the baptising ritual of the congregation, I was struck in the face with holy water. This drew a large flinch from me, something that the priest doing the water flinging noticed. I quelled the urge to shout "MONEYSHOT", for which I'm sure my companions were immensely grateful.
Lots of kneeling, standing, sitting, and singing. I kneelled, stood, and sat. But, no singing came from my mouth. I also fell off the little pillow that's kept under the pews for the kneeling part of the show. This was most embaressing, luckily no one noticed.
All in all, I enjoyed the service. Especially the bit where they mentioned Mary Magdalene. That made me very happy. The darkness, the singing, and the incense put me into such a state that I really just drifted through the entire ceremony. It felt good. Especially when The Priest They Called Him leaned over during the "Greet The Other People Around You" part of the show and said in his cutesy voice (usually only used with his boyfriend) "You're my girlfriend, Tara." I grinned a lot and gave him a big kiss on the cheek.
Easter itself was spent with a lot of sleeping and driving. I drove out to my father's house in East fucking Jabip for a short visit. We talked of cars and family woes and my upcoming trip to NYC. He prodded me over calling the funeral director he knows and I wembled, as daughters are prone to doing when they are prodded over things which they should have done by now.
Leaving there, and on the way to The Engineer's house for dinner, I saw what I believed at first to be a pheasant on the side of the road. Sitting next to a large brown mass. I swerved, while looking at it (must really learn how to sight see and drive at the same time). The Engineer pointed out that the large brown mass was in actuality a dead deer. And he says the pheasant was most likely a vulture or a buzzard or something. Are those kinds of birds in this part of the country? I never thought that they had been. I mused that it could have been a hawk, as we have thousands of those around here. But, he says that it had an elongated neck. A strange and unsettling sight, especially after finding out that it was a dead deer sitting there.
My face is breaking out in a most horrible manner. Worse than it has probably since high school. And this makes for a very uncomfortable and embaressed me. It's mainly on either side of my jawline and looks a bit like a rash, though I know it's not. Little bumps, little bumps. They make me sick and I have to physically stop myself from clawing at my face with my nails. I've been keeping it under semi-control, but it doesn't seem to be clearing up. If Carrie were accessible at the moment, I'd ask her about that skin care regimene that she concocted. I reckon I can just ask her about it when I see her this week. I feel so ugly like this. The Engineer tells me that it's not too horrifying to look at, and when I'm only looking in the bathroom or bedroom mirror it really isn't all that bad. Natural lighting, however? I look like a fucking leper. I don't even want to know what the harsh lighting in my office is going to make me appear.
Looking most longingly at my cheese grater.