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Apr. 21st, 2006 06:53 pmIt is a constant astonishment to see how people in (and formerly in) my life have changed. I'm not just talking about small personality quirks or breaking nail-biting habits or playing hair colour carousel, I'm talking about major differences between the person I originally met and the person they are today.
I recognize that I have also changed dramatically in the past few years. I've gained a sense of responsibility, for starters. And I've learned small measures of patience, which is a whole other entry unto itself. At first, I had been planning on saying that my fires had been tempered, but on further pondering, I don't think they have. The fire is still there, it burns just as brightly, it just burns in a different manner. So sure, I've changed dramatically. But, I wouldn't necessarily say that my core personality has changed much.
It's odd, noticing these changes in other people. Noticing the seemingly sudden crashbang difference in personality. It almost gives me a feeling of having been lied to, though I know that's certainly not in the case.
Most of the time.
It is also interesting to note that if I met a lot of these people as they are now, as opposed to how they were when I met them, I can safely say that I wouldn't have become close to them. Or as close to them, in some cases. Their personalities now are just that much at odds with my own, that I really don't think that the spark of connection would have been even remotely the same.
I am sometimes thankful for this, just as I am sometimes thankful that many people are no longer whirling through my orbit. But, sometimes I am not and I desperately miss who these former friends used to be. I miss them, just as I miss the friends I am only currently unable to visit with. The difference between the two being that the one set of people, I just have difficulty aligning my schedule with theirs. The other set? I'd ultimately prefer to never have darken my doorstep ever again, no matter how strong my occasional feelings of nostalgia.
This entry, of course, is just the by-product of being stuck at work, alone and with cold feet, until ten o'clock, when I will be meeting the Engineer at the movies to see The Hills Have Eyes. Originally, we'd planned on seeing Silent Hill, because I have been squirming and squeeing over suchlike since I saw the trailer a handful of months ago. However, he discovered that THHE was still playing in the theatre and we decided to see that tonight instead (with much wembling over the matter from me). So, THHE is tonight and we'll probably see Silent Hill during a Sunday matinee or somesuch.
I recognize that I have also changed dramatically in the past few years. I've gained a sense of responsibility, for starters. And I've learned small measures of patience, which is a whole other entry unto itself. At first, I had been planning on saying that my fires had been tempered, but on further pondering, I don't think they have. The fire is still there, it burns just as brightly, it just burns in a different manner. So sure, I've changed dramatically. But, I wouldn't necessarily say that my core personality has changed much.
It's odd, noticing these changes in other people. Noticing the seemingly sudden crashbang difference in personality. It almost gives me a feeling of having been lied to, though I know that's certainly not in the case.
Most of the time.
It is also interesting to note that if I met a lot of these people as they are now, as opposed to how they were when I met them, I can safely say that I wouldn't have become close to them. Or as close to them, in some cases. Their personalities now are just that much at odds with my own, that I really don't think that the spark of connection would have been even remotely the same.
I am sometimes thankful for this, just as I am sometimes thankful that many people are no longer whirling through my orbit. But, sometimes I am not and I desperately miss who these former friends used to be. I miss them, just as I miss the friends I am only currently unable to visit with. The difference between the two being that the one set of people, I just have difficulty aligning my schedule with theirs. The other set? I'd ultimately prefer to never have darken my doorstep ever again, no matter how strong my occasional feelings of nostalgia.
This entry, of course, is just the by-product of being stuck at work, alone and with cold feet, until ten o'clock, when I will be meeting the Engineer at the movies to see The Hills Have Eyes. Originally, we'd planned on seeing Silent Hill, because I have been squirming and squeeing over suchlike since I saw the trailer a handful of months ago. However, he discovered that THHE was still playing in the theatre and we decided to see that tonight instead (with much wembling over the matter from me). So, THHE is tonight and we'll probably see Silent Hill during a Sunday matinee or somesuch.