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May. 12th, 2009 12:53 amThis semester has been one of reconciling reality with my apparently massive ego.
Math for Liberal Arts grade is in (I checked today). That professor isn't known as the GPA Killer for nothing, I reckon. But DAMN.
No one's fault but my own and I'd even go so far as to say that I had it coming. I'm just so fucking burned out from schoolschoolschool that I started to not really care after I got dinged a little when the semester first started. Talked myself into a lot of it doesn't matter in the long run.
I registered for Fall, which if all goes well- will actually be my last semester at CCC. Anatomy and Physiology I, Financial Accounting, Social Issues in a Contemporary World, and Field Work. Same schedule set-up as this hell semester I'm just coming out of: Tuesday and Thursdays, 9:30 a.m. to 10:45 a.m. and Saturdays at 9:00 a.m., only now I'll have an additional class at night on Tuesday. Field Work, I just don't know about. They're Thursday afternoon from 2 to 3. I honestly can't do that to my work schedule. I've heard from one of the advisors that the class only meets one a month because it's more of a checking-in kind of thing anyway, but what about the internship that's connected to it? How the fuck am I supposed to fit that in?
I'm thinking of just cashing this shit out at the end of the semester and calling it a day so I can just start taking my funeral classes already. I've got more than enough credits to join the program, after all. I can always go back and finish the associate's, to put me on the road to bachelor's and master's I"ve also been doing a lot of contemplation of do I really NEED a master's degree in Thanatology? NO. Am I only going in that academic direction to be pretentious? YES. Fuck this school shit, I've always wanted to be a waitress. Why did I wait until my 30s to start deciding on careers?
I'm sure the doubt and negative self-talk are more than normal, but it's. fucking. maddening.
(On top of all this, I've found out that for actual funeral school I can go Part-Time, which is twice a week at night and do the degree in two and a half years or I can go Full-Time, which Monday-Wednesday-Friday from 9am to 5pm and be done with the degree in TWO FUCKING SEMESTERS. No matter how I look at it, I can NOT drop my hours at work to do full-time like that. The Engineer suggested I get a private living expense loan to do it, like he did, but it's a community college and they don't really do that sort of thing. I am also am not keen on the idea of taking that much money on in debt, even if I could. I am tearing my hair out over here.)
Math for Liberal Arts grade is in (I checked today). That professor isn't known as the GPA Killer for nothing, I reckon. But DAMN.
No one's fault but my own and I'd even go so far as to say that I had it coming. I'm just so fucking burned out from schoolschoolschool that I started to not really care after I got dinged a little when the semester first started. Talked myself into a lot of it doesn't matter in the long run.
I registered for Fall, which if all goes well- will actually be my last semester at CCC. Anatomy and Physiology I, Financial Accounting, Social Issues in a Contemporary World, and Field Work. Same schedule set-up as this hell semester I'm just coming out of: Tuesday and Thursdays, 9:30 a.m. to 10:45 a.m. and Saturdays at 9:00 a.m., only now I'll have an additional class at night on Tuesday. Field Work, I just don't know about. They're Thursday afternoon from 2 to 3. I honestly can't do that to my work schedule. I've heard from one of the advisors that the class only meets one a month because it's more of a checking-in kind of thing anyway, but what about the internship that's connected to it? How the fuck am I supposed to fit that in?
I'm thinking of just cashing this shit out at the end of the semester and calling it a day so I can just start taking my funeral classes already. I've got more than enough credits to join the program, after all. I can always go back and finish the associate's, to put me on the road to bachelor's and master's I"ve also been doing a lot of contemplation of do I really NEED a master's degree in Thanatology? NO. Am I only going in that academic direction to be pretentious? YES. Fuck this school shit, I've always wanted to be a waitress. Why did I wait until my 30s to start deciding on careers?
I'm sure the doubt and negative self-talk are more than normal, but it's. fucking. maddening.
(On top of all this, I've found out that for actual funeral school I can go Part-Time, which is twice a week at night and do the degree in two and a half years or I can go Full-Time, which Monday-Wednesday-Friday from 9am to 5pm and be done with the degree in TWO FUCKING SEMESTERS. No matter how I look at it, I can NOT drop my hours at work to do full-time like that. The Engineer suggested I get a private living expense loan to do it, like he did, but it's a community college and they don't really do that sort of thing. I am also am not keen on the idea of taking that much money on in debt, even if I could. I am tearing my hair out over here.)