(no subject)

[thejunipertree]

I am fiercely loyal to my friends. To a fault, some might even say. I have been known to be incredibly angry with someone, then defend them in the next breath. It is just how I am and it has caused numerous arguements with the Engineer, as he is more of the 'shoot first, ask questions later (if at all)' type.

However, once you're out, you stay out.

Once someone has crossed that final line in the sand, there is no turning back. And it normally takes quite a bit of pushing to get over that line. I am, after all, fairly apathetic laid back. If that line is breeched, and it takes an incredible amount of bullshit for me to get to that point, I will never share air space with that person ever again (except, perhaps, for funerals that we both attend and then that person will be ignored more than they have ever been ignored before in their entire life).

In the past handful of years, I have completely written off five people (with a sixth one currently skating around the edge). You won't find mention of the why, how or when in my journal, filtered entries or the public ones, because I frequently keep my own counsel on matters such as this. It pained me to do it, because I hate throwing in the towel, but in all those cases, it needed to be done. My limits of understanding and friendship had been reached, sometimes the thread of my friendship was so frayed and tattered, that it was moreso a friendship in theory, rather then in fact.

Their actions or behaviour was deemed unforgivable, fucked up and just plain wrong. No apology will ever change it.

Comments

[sola.livejournal.com]

can somebody get an amen. ;p


tho' i admit to being guilty about posting about that kind of thing. it was too big and painful at the time. but, still: yes.

[serpent-sky.livejournal.com]

I give people chances. Too many chances. I can think of a few people whoI let push and push and push until they basically ended up well beyond redemption. And I feel bad about that, about casting people out who were at one point inner circle, important people who I shared time, life, secrets, and whatever else with. The person who taught me how to drive is one such person: he couldn't accept that I was not in love with him, and was, in fact, in love with Matt, despite the fact that I had met him through Matt, after we were together for three months. I kept giving him chances, and it just went too far. Sometimes, I still feel bad though -- was he really that bad? And then I realize... yes. He was. [A friend caught him messing with my top when I was asleep at a party, and he ran away when he saw my friend coming.]

I've also been cast out, myself, due to my own stupidity, so I guess that's why I feel that remorse when I had to do it myself. Because I know I never meant to do what got ne excommunicated by said friend, and that a lot of it was stupid miscommunication/desperation/etc.

I don't know. It's hard.

[ninjalicious.livejournal.com]

P.S. COME TO MY HOUSE.

[ninjalicious.livejournal.com]

P.S.S. I found your computer!!

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

I give people chances.

I do the same. Chances upon chances, until I'm blue in the face.
But, there is always a point when a certain line gets crossed that I just can not hand those chances out any longer.

I gave someone chances for twelve years, until that last completely unforgiveable offense. The funny thing is, what they said wasn't even directed towards me. But, my limit had been reached and they were shown the door.

[serpent-sky.livejournal.com]

you know what you're doing; nobody else is gonna look out for you.

Sometimes, it's easier to defend/be angry for those you care about, than it is for yourself. At least for me. I'd destroy someone for messing with Matt before I would for bothering me. Which is silly, because he can take care of himself, but... how I see the world.

[mrbadluck.livejournal.com]

i get ya,,sometimes people do need to get written off,and sometimes people say shit when there pissed off that is just plain wrong,and there is no excuse for,and maybe later apoligise for it and maybe not,but at the end of they day wrighting people off for what they may have done to someone else?in certian circumstances sure its a judgement call,,but its also pack mentalaty,which im sure you have fallen victom to a couple of times in your life.12 years is a long time,and some things you just cant defend a person for,,,but it sucks when everyone turns on you because you were a complete asshole.but what do i know.
im not trying to knock your judgement ,i have just been on the shitty end of the "you were an ass so nopw all the "cool kids" dont like you anymore stick". that shit hurts,and as much as allot of time it all blows over you never quite forget that shit,its part of why im a bit of a recluse these days...i dunno

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

i have just been on the shitty end of the "you were an ass so nopw all the "cool kids" dont like you anymore stick".

I know that you have and so have I. We're the villian of the week club, remember? ;) Yes, it sucks and it's always shitty.

However, in this particular incident (the 12-year friendship being ended) I'm in the minority and it is most definitely not a case of 'all the cool kids' turning their back on this person. I made this decision completely on my own and without discussing it with anyone else.

It took a lot for me to come to this decision and it wasn't one that I made very lightly, nor was it one that didn't cause me any pain.

[evilbalddago.livejournal.com]

It is just how I am and it has caused numerous arguements with the Engineer, as he is more of the 'shoot first, ask questions later (if at all)' type.

Not always. Don't forget that. POW-POW!

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

I'm sure you mean MY BROTHER'S computer.

Just because we've stolen them doesn't mean it's *our* donkey porn?

[ninjalicious.livejournal.com]

Well your computer, your brother's porn.