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thejunipertreeThe Sensitive Artist told me this evening, through ICQ, that he thinks he's going to lay low for a bit. All of the nastiness which arose last week (I know, I didn't discuss any of this. I didn't care to.) was still in the air, though attempts at reperation were being tried out.
He said that he won't be unavailable, but that he's going to be disappeared until the dust clears. And even then, he doesn't know what's going to happen because of all the ugliness which had been unleashed upon our little group of friends.
Truthfully, I don't know what to think. I can surely understand where he's coming from, as I've been through pretty much the same (though my experiences went on for much, much longer). But, I tend to be of the sort who just lets things fall by the wayside. It takes an awful lot to incur my wrath and even more for me to hold a grudge. And it's not as if he's hating any of us. He just feels uncomfortable and thinks that in the future, the uncomfortable feeling won't go away. Like a pin that you don't spot in a shirt. You put the shirt on and the pin might not prick you right away, but it's bound to happen.
Personally, I think he's being very silly.
It also put me into a bit of an awkward situation as his birthday is the day before mine (in two weeks, mind you). I had been planning on asking him if he'd like to be taken to see Red Dragon. But, now with all of this out on the table...I'm not sure if my approaches will be seen as an actual gesture of friendship (which they are meant to be) or as a ham fisted way of appeasing him.
In other, much more drama laden, news it has been brought to my attention that my dickhead sibling is a junkie. Or is recovering. Or is still using. It all depends on who you want to believe. Months ago, when my mother was first in the hospital, my cousin (who is a confirmed smack addict) told me over the phone that DH had been using. And with her, at that. I discussed this with my mother, who my cousin had also told. Mom was of the mind that since Cousin Dearest is a spectacular liar (and holding a grudge against Sibling), that she was not to be believed under any circumstances.
However when I ran into him that one day in the hospital (while visiting my mom), I could SEE it. I knew. I've seen The Look (TM) a million times before. I've known a great number of heroin users. I know definitely what they look like when they're strung out. And that was precisely the look on his face, as well as his general appearence.
Now, on the way home from chemotherapy, my mother tells me that they had a very long phone conversation not too long ago where he came clean (ha!) about the whole ordeal. Yes, he's been using heroin. He's apparently been using drugs for a very long time. Not only that, but he holds her partially to blame because the person who had introduced him to the drug scene (at the tender age of eleven) was a friend of the family.
I sat there, trying to concentrate on driving and not leaping out of my seat shouting "I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!"
And my mother, of course, is very torn up over the whole thing.
I want to kick so many people right now. It's probably why I'm having all of these stomach problems and feeling poorly. With my stupid luck, I'm most likely forming an ulcer.
He said that he won't be unavailable, but that he's going to be disappeared until the dust clears. And even then, he doesn't know what's going to happen because of all the ugliness which had been unleashed upon our little group of friends.
Truthfully, I don't know what to think. I can surely understand where he's coming from, as I've been through pretty much the same (though my experiences went on for much, much longer). But, I tend to be of the sort who just lets things fall by the wayside. It takes an awful lot to incur my wrath and even more for me to hold a grudge. And it's not as if he's hating any of us. He just feels uncomfortable and thinks that in the future, the uncomfortable feeling won't go away. Like a pin that you don't spot in a shirt. You put the shirt on and the pin might not prick you right away, but it's bound to happen.
Personally, I think he's being very silly.
It also put me into a bit of an awkward situation as his birthday is the day before mine (in two weeks, mind you). I had been planning on asking him if he'd like to be taken to see Red Dragon. But, now with all of this out on the table...I'm not sure if my approaches will be seen as an actual gesture of friendship (which they are meant to be) or as a ham fisted way of appeasing him.
In other, much more drama laden, news it has been brought to my attention that my dickhead sibling is a junkie. Or is recovering. Or is still using. It all depends on who you want to believe. Months ago, when my mother was first in the hospital, my cousin (who is a confirmed smack addict) told me over the phone that DH had been using. And with her, at that. I discussed this with my mother, who my cousin had also told. Mom was of the mind that since Cousin Dearest is a spectacular liar (and holding a grudge against Sibling), that she was not to be believed under any circumstances.
However when I ran into him that one day in the hospital (while visiting my mom), I could SEE it. I knew. I've seen The Look (TM) a million times before. I've known a great number of heroin users. I know definitely what they look like when they're strung out. And that was precisely the look on his face, as well as his general appearence.
Now, on the way home from chemotherapy, my mother tells me that they had a very long phone conversation not too long ago where he came clean (ha!) about the whole ordeal. Yes, he's been using heroin. He's apparently been using drugs for a very long time. Not only that, but he holds her partially to blame because the person who had introduced him to the drug scene (at the tender age of eleven) was a friend of the family.
I sat there, trying to concentrate on driving and not leaping out of my seat shouting "I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!"
And my mother, of course, is very torn up over the whole thing.
I want to kick so many people right now. It's probably why I'm having all of these stomach problems and feeling poorly. With my stupid luck, I'm most likely forming an ulcer.
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Date: 2002-09-25 10:43 am (UTC)I understand how things seem to pile up on you when you least expect it. :( I hope everything will be ok. *hugs* Please remember I am here if you ever need to spout off.