boot to the skull

[thejunipertree]

Overheard just now: "God is so good, don't you just love Him? The high you get off Him. Ain't nothing like it."

I'm going to break my boot off in someone's ass today. I just know it. 9:43 in the morning and she's starting with her shit already. I can't deal with this. Not today.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not anti-religion. Anyone who knows me well, knows that I have a great deal of respect for religion and that I am a fairly religious person. I just have different opinions about what's right for /me./ Hence, all of my stories of Baron and the other lwa. Religion is one of my favourite things to discuss and debate and to pour over.

However, the WORKPLACE is not the place to fucking prostelitize (spelling?). I have no desire to hear some skewed version of the Bible while I'm trying to get my day's work done. This isn't a place to witness. This isn't the time to fucking evangelise.

Great.
She's fucking singing again.

*stomp stomp stomp*

I don't want to start trouble in this department. I don't want to be the person who complains about feeling uncomfortable or offended. I'm not the type of person who finds offense in the smallest mention of a mainstream religion like Christianity. But, I can't deal with this for much longer. I can't.

>:O

Comments

nonplussed.

[canonfire.livejournal.com]

if it makes you feel better, I have a Masters of Divinity, have studied early Christianity for over five years, have read theology and philosophy for 10 and I get really annoyed by people who do that sort of stuff at work. The fun part is that people like that find out that I have more than a clue about their religion and when they start asking questions, they learn to shut up pretty fast. They don't want to know what I know, it seems. How strange!

Evangelicalism is one thing. Tactless and annoying evangelicalism is quite another.

Re: nonplussed.

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

I don't have any degrees in theology or suchlike, but I've been studying religion for going on 14 years. I absolutely /love/ to discuss it, all of it. From paganism to Christianity, I don't care. If it's religion, I'm interested. But, these people just don't seem to comprehend simple office etiquette.

That and they're just STUPID. They haven't the faintest idea of what they're talking about, it seems. It's just stupid blind following.

The one lady I know from a previous job, and I didn't ever have a problem with her before. I knew she was very devout, but she kept it to herself. Now that this other woman has started working here, it's all that's ever talked about.

I almost put my fist through the other one's face an hour ago when she asked if my mother went to church (my mom has cancer and they seem to think that belief in Jebus will make everything all sunshine and daisies again).

grr, I say.

Re: nonplussed.

[cavalorn.livejournal.com]

What really pisses me off (with my C of E education, heh) is the kind of person who takes an essentially dignified, challenging, sublimely mysterious religion and sticks it in their mental crack pipe so they can get a BUZZ off it.

There may be 'good news' in Christianity, just as there is alcohol in fine wine; but to act as if the Good News, the Feeling Good, the Yay Hurrah Happy Happy Joy Joy Salvation aspect was the be-all and end-all of it is essentially to distil out the alcohol - again, for a BUZZ - and leave the body of the wine behind.

If religion is the opium of the masses, then ecstatic fundamentalist religion is the smack.

[cavalorn.livejournal.com]

Repeat after me:

'Your mother sucks cocks in Hell'
'Your mother sucks cocks in Hell'
'Your mother sucks cocks in Hell'

Frothing at the mouth and rolling of eyes helps too.

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

Failing that, I could start telling stories about my relatives down South who are involved in one of the snake handling cults.

With my luck, they'd be into that though.

^_^

[vivaemptiness.livejournal.com]

i should come visit you at lunchtime someday. i'll wear a big star of david, put on some horns,
and start talking about how cool it is that my people killed jebus.

L:D

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

D00D.

You're on!

The Procedure

[crankydaddy.livejournal.com]

First you type up a statement to be signed by the offending party, Making sure to use polite but firm language showing your respect for the religion and your own rights. Pop it by a supervisor, ask thoughtful questions how to resolve this without blowing productivity. Be especially vocal about not causing a scene and simply wanting to do your best for the company.

After this preparation, visit the person in question. In humble tones (an quiet enough for no one else to overhear)ask them more about their religion due to an 'overwhelming sense' ot rightness as of late.

As they take your hand or arm (as they tend to do) Plant the most convenient limb in their mush. Yelling "Are you crazy! My God they're calling me a spawn of Satan! Their trying to convert me with ridicule!" If they thrash about a bit, all the better, you can plant a few kicks also.

For the more passive crowd, record all conversations for later playback in public with prepared professional liturgical criticism. Cupcakes to be handed out after-wards.


*Got to get a bloody set of icons, being blank stinks*

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I suppose it wouldn't be very constructive to have loud conversations with -someone- (or anyone) about how much you love Baal and how much of a buzz you get from making offerings to the dark lord. But that is one path you might take.

If they complain you could always hand them a pamphlet and make sure they know that Baal loves all his children, even the lost ones!

I'm not helping, am I?

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

I'm not helping, am I?

Not really. ;)

Though it does remind me of my wayward youth when we would hand out pamphlets extolling the wonders of Cthulhu, while standing next to the Jebus Crispies preaching on the street.

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

"Cthulhu loves you (especially broiled in lobster sause)"

slackers

[wemble.livejournal.com]

maybe this woman should take all this free time she has to talk about God and do some actual WORK... what is she getting paid for??? sheesh...