a letter to the editor

[thejunipertree]

Dear Sir/Madame:

If I don't get to see the ocean, and right quick, I am going to SUE. I am going to SUE EVERYBODY.

This photograph:


(the Engineer, me, and Miss Janette)

is from the last time I was able to go. It was two years ago. Two years since I have been able to touch seawater and/or shout profanity at the dolphins is completely unacceptable. I would recommend that this must be remedied, post haste.

Signed,

one pissed-off little Goth girl

Comments

[missjanette.livejournal.com]

Dear Pissed-Off Little Goth Girl,

You are cordially invited to join me at this year's Mermaid Parade on June 25th. ( http://www.coneyisland.com/mermaid.shtml ) I am also sorely lacking in the ocean-touching department. I am also sorely lacking in the cackling-with-Tara department as well. There will be cackling, ocean touching, mermaid scoping and general mayhem. Wahoo.

love,

miss j.

[greyboy.livejournal.com]

Dear [somewhat miffed] Madam [of Gothic extraction],

If you bear with us and kindly take notice of the current attrition rate of your polar ice caps, we can faithfully assert that the ocean will indeed be right to your doorstep, given enough time and patience.

In the meantime, the afore-mentioned dolphins respectfully request that you refrain from any and all execrations directed toward their persons, as one of them is currently going through a rather messy and painful divorce.

Thank you,
the mgmt.

[madamewoselle.livejournal.com]

Dear Pissed Goth,

I too understand the lure of the ocean. Three long years have passed since my feet graced the shores of Cape May Point. My mother, on the other hand, had waited 35 years to get back to said ocean until about 6 weeks ago. My advice for you is this, Goth Friend: get a damn good settlement from whomever you plan to sue, give my mom a call, and see if she wants to visit the ocean with some random stranger who likes platform shoes. I'm sure she will, and she's a good cook too. I can come along for yuks and merriment, and we'll have a fine time looking for Cape May diamonds. Whattaya say??

Sincerely
The Girl Who Has Straight D's!

[theepumpkingirl.livejournal.com]

To all whom long for thee ocean,

PLEASE FUCKING GOD, TAKE ME WITH YOU.

That is all.

Hopefully yours,
One Fidgety Girl

[mrbadluck.livejournal.com]

um,,,isnt that why you have A BIG ASS CAR!!! and you live in a coastal state,,,its 45 minutes from your house tops,,20 if you drive all snazzy,,,get in the car and go woman,,noone is stopping you. damn i even make it once a year and i hate the ocean,,natures toylet if you ask me

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

um,,,isnt that why you have A BIG ASS CAR!!! and you live in a coastal state,,,

The problem is, I rarely have time for a day trip like that. I'm working six days a week, ten to eleven hours a day. :/

[mrbadluck.livejournal.com]

im sorry to hear that,,i do the six days thing,,it sucks you cant to anything,,ever,,i hope you see the ocean soon

[saturnia.livejournal.com]

I live so close to the Pacific and I am lame for not taking more advantage.

Emily Strange is having a drawing for a Nick Cave box set! Enter before the 25th! If I win I'll give it to you. :)

[aprilrobin.livejournal.com]

WAY TO STEAL MY BANDWIDTH LOSER!

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

I'M CUTE AND YOU LOVE ME!

[aprilrobin.livejournal.com]

OK, you have a point.

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

:D