[no smoking] day two
Nov. 6th, 2007 10:56 amYesterday sucked.
I was doing ok, up until the point I ate my lunch. Everything pissed me off. Everyone pissed me off. I wanted nothing more than to just start shouting at people. I did shout at people. And it stayed about the same until I went to bed.
I was so freaking edgy the entire night. My limbs felt disjointed. Itchy. Constricted.
I argued with the Engineer because he felt I shouldn't have a couple hits off my bowl to try to settle down. I don't think it's "exchanging one habit for another". It's attempting to alleviate the symptoms of withdrawal. I'm not going to suddenly become a jibbering Phish-fan who enjoys hackey-sack and says, "Dude..." a lot.
Is today better? I don't rightly know. I don't feel as jittery yet, but I also haven't eaten. I was a little sideways this morning when I was getting ready for work because I normally smoke a cigarette either when I'm doing my makeup or when I'm driving to work. But, I sucked on a peppermint on my drive in. It helped a little. Not much.
My right hand hurts for some reason. Well, not my hand. Just my index finger and knuckle. It feels swollen and tight; I don't know why. I don't believe it to be related to the no smoking situation, but it's an annoyance. It's making it difficult and painful for me to type or handwrite anything. I can't crack the knuckle and I can't push the finger back more than maybe half of its normal backward range. Forward is fine, though painful. When I woke up this morning, all of my blankets were twisted around in odd placements, none of which I started the night out with. I don't remember dreaming at all, either. What the hell did I do to myself in my sleep?
I was doing ok, up until the point I ate my lunch. Everything pissed me off. Everyone pissed me off. I wanted nothing more than to just start shouting at people. I did shout at people. And it stayed about the same until I went to bed.
I was so freaking edgy the entire night. My limbs felt disjointed. Itchy. Constricted.
I argued with the Engineer because he felt I shouldn't have a couple hits off my bowl to try to settle down. I don't think it's "exchanging one habit for another". It's attempting to alleviate the symptoms of withdrawal. I'm not going to suddenly become a jibbering Phish-fan who enjoys hackey-sack and says, "Dude..." a lot.
Is today better? I don't rightly know. I don't feel as jittery yet, but I also haven't eaten. I was a little sideways this morning when I was getting ready for work because I normally smoke a cigarette either when I'm doing my makeup or when I'm driving to work. But, I sucked on a peppermint on my drive in. It helped a little. Not much.
My right hand hurts for some reason. Well, not my hand. Just my index finger and knuckle. It feels swollen and tight; I don't know why. I don't believe it to be related to the no smoking situation, but it's an annoyance. It's making it difficult and painful for me to type or handwrite anything. I can't crack the knuckle and I can't push the finger back more than maybe half of its normal backward range. Forward is fine, though painful. When I woke up this morning, all of my blankets were twisted around in odd placements, none of which I started the night out with. I don't remember dreaming at all, either. What the hell did I do to myself in my sleep?